The Kids of the New Millennium

By Teo Alfero

It was early in the morning when I arrived at the local public school. Once in the hallways, my body felt warm and comfortable again. The Mid West cold wasn’t that bad, it’s just that, living in California, I wasn’t used to it. In any case, the anticipation I was feeling for the two days ahead of me had created an inner weather that was joyful and more powerful than the outer one. It was a familiar feeling though, the same excitement I had felt many times before when visiting a schools or welcoming a new client. Once again, I was taking time off my teen-coaching business in Los Angeles to travel during the fall and teach the Safe School Ambassador program at public schools across the nation.

I greeted the students as they walked in the room and appreciated the expression on their faces, some indifferent, some excited, some skeptical. There was a boy in particular whose attitude caught my attention from the start. He showed defiance and disbelief towards the material, he didn’t participate and even gave his back to me for most of the beginning session.

He seemed to come from an immigrant family. He was wearing baggy pants, an over-sized sweat shirt, and I could see some tattoos coming down his arms and up his neck.

Later I learned that he was the leader of a local gang. The school faculty saw the strong influence he had amongst students, and convinced him to come to the training with the hope that it would help him see an alternative. If he could discover a more positive way to communicate and interact with others, many students would naturally follow him.

However, his strong resistance led me to believe that we had a big challenge in our hands with the potential to turn the training into a huge success, or drag it down to failure.

As the first day progressed, I began to realize that his hostility was in fact the result of frustration and insecurity. He actually believed that this for-peace training couldn’t change anything in his world, and he finally said so “People respect you when they are afraid of you.”

I decided to stop trying so hard to reach him and instead trust the flow of the training and the group’s ability to pull him in. Soon, his body language began to shift as he witnessed his peers having fun as they were learning something valuable for their lives. He began to pay attention as other students shared their stories, gave feedback, and expressed their commitment to make a difference in their school and community. “If we all do this more and stop bullying, this would be a much better place” he heard one of them say.

He realized that he was not alone, that his story was shared by others in the room. Slowly he began to face me, to participate in group discussions, and take notes. By the second day, he eventually decided to tell the details of his challenged childhood to a group of peers, something he hadn’t been able to do before, not even with the school counselors. At the end of the training, he was very moved and with conviction he stated his commitment to his schoolmates and faculty to become an agent of social and climate change.

This reminded me of the time I was sworn in as a Children Court Advocate years ago, Judge Nash, who preceded the ceremony said something that has stayed with me since: “If all the resources we use and all the work that we do get to change the life of a single child, it was worth the effort.” 

Who are These Kids Anyway?

Mainly known as Generation Y or Millennium Generation, they are characterized as Generation X on steroids. They are also called many other ways: the Echo Boomers, the iGeneration, the Einstein Generation, the Google Generation, the Facebook Generation, and Digital Natives. Even referred to as Generation whine by some cynical experts, and the Entitled Generation in the working arena, generation Y is a cohort of individuals born between the late 70s and the turn of the millennium. They are the kids of the Baby Boomers and, estimated to be as many as 75M individuals in the US, they constitute the most economically and socially influential segment of the population today.

I have worked with all sorts of cases, from socially privileged kids, though multi-cultural middle class, to kids under the care of the foster system. I personally call them the “Get-Real Generation” since they don’t like to beat around the bush, or “Generation Yes!” because they were raised to believe that they can accomplish anything and have whatever they want. Of course that can be a double edged sword and in this case is both the source of their inherited sense of entitlement and their high, many times unrealistic expectations of themselves and others, and the essence of their innate optimism, independent thinking, and drive for social integration and change.

They have tremendous impact on the marketplace and workforce. They can ensure the commercial success of any product or service and, as we witnessed last November, they have the power to rally for change and tilt the outcome of a presidential election.

Generation Y is ground-breaking in the sense that its members have come of age in a both politically and socially tumultuous time that made them highly adaptable to change and best equipped to deal with the highly technological, environmentally diverse, fast-paced, multitasking reality of the modern world.

Where are They Coming From?

Let’s take a moment to look at the legacy Millennials have received.

Generation Y are the grand children of the Traditionalist Generation, born between the mid-twenties and early forties. These are the people that went through the great depression, the Second World War and the GI bill, and have enjoyed the golden age of radio and the silver screen. During their time, institutions were reliable, hard work was more important than high education, and marriage was forever no questions asked. These individuals trust authority, are loyal and patriotic, financially conservative, and find honor in working hard for a future reward.

Millennials are also the children of the Baby Boomer, a generation born between the mid forties and early sixties and that, in a nutshell, was influenced by the Vietnam War, the JFK and Martin Luther King assassinations, the woman’s and civil rights movements, rock and roll, the moon landing, and credit cards. Contrary to Traditionalists, this cohort is more competitive and politically adept; they challenge authority and are liberal spenders. They identify highly with their careers and their material wealth; they are optimistic and value their health and wellness. Coming from strict and emotionally-inexpressive, traditionalist parents, Baby Boomers have swung to the other extreme and becoming loose, over expressive, and condoning.

Closer in age, Gen Yers are surrounded by young aunts and uncles, and older siblings and cousins belonging to Generation X, born between the early sixties and late seventies, this is also the cohort that competes directly with Gen Y in the marketplace and workforce. While both Baby Boomers and Gen Y are massive in numbers, Gen X is a smaller generation about half their size. Influenced by The Challenger explosion, the surge of AIDS, increase in divorce rate, corporate downsizing, and the appearance of video games, personal computers, and MTV, these individuals are both a blend of Traditionalists and Baby Boomers, and in some ways, a milder version of Gen Yers. They are skeptical, independent, resourceful, and generally risk averse. They strive for balance, value technology, mobility and autonomy, and are typically informal.

So it would be fare to say that each generation has been born in a different reality with specific events and influences that shape the way they perceive themselves and the world around them, the sum total of which has led to the exquisite blend that we call today Generation Y. A group of individuals that are both high performance and high maintenance, that believe in their own worth, that will let you know what they are thinking, and expect to be noticed when they walk in the room.

Their World and Influences 

For all these reasons, Generation Y has been the focus of experts in both government and private sectors, and much had been analyzed and written about its characteristics and influences. 

Now, it is important to consider that statistical research can be easily taken out of context and presented in ways to emphasize a particular point or create a certain response in the reader. For example, a renowned best-selling author resorts to the Department of Health and Human Services, to The National Center for Health Statistics, the US Bureau of Census, and to the US Department of Education to offer some statistics to illustrate how the situation for families have changed over the last few decades:

• Illegitimate birth rates increased 400%
• The percentage of families headed by a single parent more than tripled
• Divorce rate more than doubled
• Teenage suicide increased almost 300%
• The number one health problem for women is domestic violence
• One in four of all adolescents will contract an STD before they graduate from high school

Since 1940 the top disciplinary problems in public schools have changes from:

Furthermore, a specialized internet blog enumerates what they consider to be the events that Millennials are most likely to remember and “identify with” being the 9/11 terrorist attacks, the current Iraq War, Hurricane Katrina, the Indian Ocean Tsunami, and the Columbine High School shooting. The death of Princess Diana, the return of Hong Kong to China, the O.J. Simpson trial, the Oklahoma City bombing, the Monica Lewinsky scandal, Y2K, anthrax scares, the SARS epidemic and the avian flu.

Predictably, the same resource describes members of Generation Y as “identified with cynicism, skepticism and pessimism in comparison to past generations” and backs this statement with a report from the newsletter of the National Association of Women Law Enforcement Executives, which states that “antidepressants, prescription medication and other behavior-altering drugs, such as Ritalin, make Gen Yers the most medicated generation in history.”

However, while all these facts and statistics might be true, I believe they have a definite negative focus and deprive kids and young adults from their natural humanness. They present a reality that is at best incomplete and puts the young generation in a box with the label “Next Problem to Fix” on it.

In my experience, this generation is very sensitive and ethically correct. If a teenager shows cynicism, skepticism and pessimism it is most likely the result of an inner conflict between what they know is right and what they see in the world; between the advice they receive and what they hear adults say, and what they see them do.

So let’s bring some balance to the equation and look at other elements that will help us understand what I believe to be the most fascinating cohort of individuals.

In their report, NAS Insight states that “Family cohesion is alive and well in the 21^st century” and millennium generation has been brought up in the most child-centered generation ever. Yes, more than half of all families in the U.S. have divorced parents, and that has given Gen Yers a good sense of independence, however, being the age of the “active parent” there is more time spent with the children. The parents of Generation Y view the child as the center of the family and are very involved in their daily lives and decisions. They help them plan their achievements, take part in their activities, and show strong beliefs in their child’s worth.

Patty Giordani, in “Y Recruiting” (2005) states, “The secure feeling attained by strong parental involvement makes the members of the Y Generation believe they can accomplish most anything, and if they don’t, they can always go back home and get help and support.”

Other influences that are shaping this generation are most definitely the information technology, My Space, Facebook, and You Tube, the Girl’s movement, the surge of main-stream alternative medicine, the surge of main-stream non-denominational integrative spirituality, the gifted kids movement with psychic children, indigo children, and crystalline children, the “parenting as coaching” movement, and the first African American President.

These kids have been nurtured and over-indulged and have different expectations about the world. From a young age, Generation Y is told, through both the media and home, that they can have it all which gives this generation a strong sense of entitlement. Striving for a quality of life only known by the rich and famous, wanting the best and thinking they deserve it, makes Generation Y driven and ambitious, with high expectations.

They are optimistic, confident, natural multi-taskers, and civic minded. They appreciate constant feedback but are not used to critical feedback, which means that they appreciate being told how great they are and don’t know how to manage conflict. They have good project management skills, value teamwork, reciprocity and diversity, and believe everybody is their friend.

They have a great sense of morality and civic duty so, if they have something to say, you will hear it. They are connected anytime, anywhere, anyhow.

At the Workplace

Millennials are the fastest growing segment of the work force; their share has grown from 14% to 21% representing more than 30M workers in the last four years. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, by the year 2012, Generation Y will have filled the 18-34 age group. This means that the number of younger adult workers will increase by 10% between 2003 and 2012. This happens at the same time the number of workers aged 35-44 will decrease by 6%.

A 24 year-old writer at the St. Louis Small Business Monthly, said in an interview with USA Today, that many of his generation have traveled and had many enriching experiences, so they may clash with older generations they see as competition or not as skilled. “We’re surprised we have to work for our money. We want the corner office right away,” he says. “It seems like our parents just groomed us. Anything is possible. We had karate class, soccer practice, everything. But they deprived us of social skills.”

With attitudes the way they are, many of the Millennials would like to be self-employed. However, very few are able to do so because of high start-up rates and the cost of providing health insurance. Only 1.9% of workers under age 25 are self-employed.

At the work place, Generation Yers do not want to perform menial tasks in entry-level positions and they are less likely to respond to the traditional command-and-control type of management still popular in much of today’s workforce,” says Jordan Kaplan, an associate managerial science professor at Long Island University-Brooklyn in New York. “They’ve grown up questioning their parents, and now they’re questioning their employers. They don’t know how to shut up, which is great, but that’s aggravating to the 50-year-old manager who says, ‘Do it and do it now.’ ”

The “speak your mind philosophy” makes total sense to Generation Yers, they are not afraid to challenge the status quo so we can expect to see some changes in the way things are being run.

Bruce Tulgan, founder of Rainmaker thinking, identifies three main characteristics of Gen Yers at the work place:

• They have financial smarts. After witnessing the financial insecurity that beset earlier generations stung by layoffs and the dot-com bust, they are generally savvy when it comes to money and savings.

• Work-life balance isn’t just a buzz word. They are more interested in making their jobs accommodate their family and personal lives. They want jobs with flexibility, telecommuting options and the ability to go part time or leave the workforce temporarily when children are in the picture. One of them said to USA Today “After 9/11, there is a realization that life is short. You value it more.”

• Change, change, change. They don’t expect to stay in a job, or even a career, for too long and are skeptical when it comes to such concepts as employee loyalty. They don’t like to stay too long on any one assignment either. This is a generation of multi-taskers, and they can juggle text messaging, e-mail, and online research.

They believe in their own self worth and value enough that they’re not shy about trying to change the companies they work for. They walk in with high expectations for themselves, their employer, and their boss. If you thought you saw a clash when Generation X came into the workplace, that was the fake punch. The haymaker is coming now.” Tulgan says.

What’s Important to Them?

• Good relationships with boss and co-workers
• Income
• Opportunity for growth
• Opportunity to show off skills and receiving recognition for a job well done
• Challenging daily work
• Flexible schedules for social and personal time
• A casual dress environment

The attitude of this generation is a direct product of their parents. These kids know that their parents are behind them, and rely on them for personal and financial support.

If you are an employer, co-worker, client, or vendor of a Millennial, do not assume that their values, work ethic and attitudes are the same as the previous generations.

Gary Hamel listed twelve basic characteristics of Gen Yers Internet folklore at the Wall Street Journal Blog. For them,

1. All ideas compete on an equal footing. Ideas gain traction based on their perceived merits, rather than on the political power of their sponsors.
2. Contribution counts for more than credentials. When you post a video to YouTube, no one asks you if you went to film school. When you write a blog, no one cares whether you have a journalism degree. None of the usual status differentiators carry much weight online.
3. Hierarchies are natural, not prescribed. In any Web forum there are some individuals who command more respect; and their clout reflects the freely given approbation of their peers. On the Web, authority trickles up, not down.
4. Leaders serve rather than preside. Credible arguments, demonstrated expertise and selfless behavior are the only levers for getting things done through other people. Forget this online, and your followers will soon abandon you.
5. Tasks are chosen, not assigned. The Web is an opt-in economy. People choose to work on the things that interest them. Everyone is an independent contractor.
6. Groups are self-defining and -organizing. You have the freedom to link up with some individuals and ignore the rest, to share deeply with some folks and not at all with others. Just as no one can assign you a boring task, no can force you to work with dim-witted colleagues.
7. Resources get attracted, not allocated. Human effort flows towards ideas and projects that are attractive (and fun), and away from those that aren’t. In this sense, the Web is a market economy where millions of individuals get to decide, moment by moment, how to spend the precious currency of their time and attention.
8. Power comes from sharing information, not hoarding it. The Web is also a gift economy. To gain influence and status, you have to give away your expertise and content. And you must do it quickly; if you don’t, someone else will beat you to the punch—and garner the credit that might have been yours. Online, there are a lot of incentives to share, and few incentives to hoard.
9. Opinions compound and decisions are peer-reviewed. On the Internet, truly smart ideas rapidly gain a following. And once aggregated, the voice of the masses can be used as a battering ram to challenge the entrenched interests of institutions in the offline world.
10. Users can veto most policy decisions. The only way to keep users loyal is to give them a substantial say in key decisions. You may have built the community, but the users really own it.
11. Intrinsic rewards matter most. Think of all the work done for free on the Web and it’s obvious that human beings will give generously when they’re given the chance to contribute to something they actually care about.
12. Hackers are heroes. Online communities frequently embrace those with strong anti-authoritarian views.

At the Marketplace

With such influence and decision power, companies have been struggling to find creative ways to target Generation Y. However, J. Walker Smith, a managing partner at Yankelovich Partners Inc. who specializes in generational marketing, told Business Week Magazine ”Most marketers perceive them as kids. When you do that, you fail to take in what they are telling you about the consumers they’re becoming,” he said ”This is not about teenage marketing. It’s about the coming of age of a generation.”

How are Millennials Different?

• They’re Plugged In: The term “digital native” applies to most Gen Yers. They watch TV, surf the Web, listen to music, and talk or text on their phones, often performing several of these things at the same time.

• It’s not about TV: Instead of watching TV, Gen Yers spend more time surfing the Web and using other devices, like iPods and Xboxes. For them, TV is often just “background noise.”

• They Don’t Care About Your Ad, They Care What Their Friends Think: When it comes to making decisions, Gen Y tends to rely on their network of friends and their recommendations, not traditional ads. “Ads that push a slogan, an image, and a feeling, the younger consumer is not going to go for,’‘ says James R. Palczynski, retail analyst for Ladenburg Thalmann & Co. Instead, they respond to “humor, irony, and the unvarnished truth.” They’re also somewhat distrusting of ads, which is why grassroots efforts can also work. However, don’t get too comfortable, Gen Y doesn’t have brand loyalty – they’re quick to move the next big thing.

Education and Gen Y

When it comes to education, volumes can be, and have been written on how to communicate and convey information in these times of cultural diversity and technological super-highways. Experts worldwide are continuously putting out their best effort to incorporate the newest research in order to design more effective programs that will engage a generation that is fast pace, wired for multi-stimuli, with a short attention span, and constantly ready to jump onto the next thing. Nevertheless, Millennials are one of the most educated generations yet, and they love to learn. Going to college is no longer reserved for the elite, it is the norm, which means that they are not lacking information. However, we know now that one of the reasons main-stream education systems worldwide are falling short is the assumption that information alone is the key to successfully form an individual.

So there are three factors that I want to emphasize now the combination of which are fascinating and fundamentally affect the field of education:

• It is undeniable that the world is changing at an increasing rate.

• Each generation experiences the world in a different way, and each one believes that “this is it.”

• Human behavioral sciences and spiritual traditions agree that we tend to repeat the behaviors we’ve witnessed, and the situations we’ve experienced in the past. We do things the way our ancestors did them.

The question is then: How do we prepare Generation Y, and any other generation for that matter, for the unknown challenges ahead? We have no idea how the future will look, and yet we have to prepare them for it. So why not incorporate some of the essential principles that have accompanied us for millennia. If you want to organically complete the education of the next generation and give them strong wings so they can fly through any storm, teach them to be fully present in the moment, to keep their minds and hearts open, to first listen and then talk, to nurture the capacity to feel awe, to retain the ability to be surprised, to let their imagination fly and think creatively, to bring their passion and heart into their decisions, to practice gratitude and kindness, to have a loving attitude to self and others, to get involved, collaborate, and think win-win, to be awake and vigilant in order to sense the vibrations both coming in and going out.

In the particular case of Gen Yers, offer to them ways for them to see the difference between knowing that anything is possible and having the resources to do it. Show them the contrast between true confidence and empty confidence,; between pretending that you can take the world with hardly any effort, and knowing that you truly have what it takes because you’ve earned it.

Of course you can find these and other basic principles in spiritual traditions, self help books, and human potential books, but there is only one way to teach these things: by modeling them. If you want your child, or anybody else, to show these virtues, you must do it first.

Practical Actions

Generation Y presents the most fascinating duality with their overwhelming self-centeredness and their keen social and global awareness, therefore it is important that you pay attention to them and practice what I call “Parenting, or mentorship, or leadership, as coaching.”

Here are some practical things you can do in addition to the principles outlined in the previous section:

In Family and Personal relationships

• Trust them … but give them clear boundaries, they are still kids and need a safe environment in order to manifest their brilliance

• Learn from them: pay attention, listen to them; they have a lot to offer

• Keep it real: don’t try to manipulate the situation, they won’t fall for it easily, and even if they do, they will lose their respect for you

• Be straight forward and truthful: don’t beat around the bush, say what you mean and mean what you say. If you make a mistake, admit it; and show them how to learn from it and move on

• Keep it brief and to the point, they can get bored with long discussions

• Be the coach instead of telling them what to do. Prepare your part and ask questions in a way that will elicit their outcomes and strategies

• Help them find meaning in their work

• Let them do the work and acknowledge them when they deserve it. Telling them that they are great all the time will lose the punch

• Let them face the consequences of their decisions. This is training time so they can build the muscles necessary to face the real life challenges ahead. If they need to fail, let them. Never condone their shortcomings

• Don’t take things personally; they are resolving many things within themselves. It is not really about you

• Use every situation as learning and growing opportunities. We are supposed to have ups and downs in life, it is what we do with them that makes the difference.

• Give more responsibility and fewer chores. Let them chose what their contribution to the household will be; and give them clear guidelines to support their success.

At the Workplace:

• Encourage their values: show appreciation and allow them to have input into the decision-making process.

• Train them: If you want a job well done, tell them how to do it

• Mentor them: Give feedback, positive and negative; give the reasoning behind your decisions

• Show them how their work will contribute to the bottom line

• Provide full disclosure: If they feel you are not truthful, they will not be satisfied

• Create customized career paths: This will create a sense of control that Gen Y desires and will provide them with a realistic account of their progress and their future with the employer

• Offer benefits such as flexible work schedules, telecommuting, full tuition reimbursement and online mentoring tools.

• Provide access to technology: Having the newest and the best technology at their fingertips will attract and retain Generation Y employees.

And above all, respect THEM and LOVE THEM … you will get back what you offer.

* * *

To say that I love working with teens and young adults would be an understatement; and even though my life purpose is to be of service to the next generation, I must confess that my reasons are also selfish since I get as much or perhaps more than they do. They are my teachers and my inspiration. To see these kids time and time again grow and blossom as they move through a sea of emotions and change; to witness their hope and trust in new and better ways, and watch them jump in with both feet the moment they manifest a path that talks to their heart’s desires, gives me such indescribable satisfaction and self reward that I couldn’t think of a better way to spend my life.-

Thank you for reading.